enough

i fucking had enough. don't you have the basic common sense to be responsible towards others?

when you were enjoying yourself in korea, i waited every night for anything from you. you went missing after the first round of messages, and your pathetically short facebook message. i understand that there wasn't wi-fi anywhere, but you fucking had the phone, how much of the battery charge would u waste just to drop me one short message to tell me to stop waiting?

each time you come late to a date, do you ever realise how disrespectful it is? i made my effort to come on time, and you could be uncontactable for an entire hour. have i not told you many many times, tell me if you are going to be late. is it very difficult to comprehend? you say you were rushing? what fucking bullshit is that? do you not have ten seconds on the bus, on the train, while waiting for the transport, on the escalator, to send just one short message to save me from waiting like an idiot?

when you go out with your friends or cousins or whoever, i don't expect you to keep messaging me or what. i have told you a million fucking time. if up till now you still have this misconception then i doubt that you have actually ever listened to me. to listen, not to hear. but is it not common sense that if you have spent the whole fucking day with them, then do me a little favour and entertain me when i call to just talk to you for a few minutes? is that too fucking much to ask for? is that? it is not that i am jealous of them, your friends or cousins, you can well go spend the fucking rest of your every day with them, but please can't you be there when i want to talk to you for a while?

why am i always the last to find out? whether you're going out with your beloved friends or dear cousins, do i have to see it from facebook before you decide to tell me, when i have already planned my 48 hours worth of free time per week to accompany you. is my time not as precious as yours?

you say that i lose my temper at you. it is true, i am wrong for that. but then can you understand my frustration at your insensitivity? breaking up is not the solution, just the easy way out. i am sorry that i blurted it out in anger. i know that it is no good saying sorry only after each time i do something wrong. am i having overtly high expectations, or just that you don't have the minimal expectation for self conduct? i am writing nonsense now. i am in the wrong. i should not try to change you.